Words Of Wisdom

If you are chilling with me and my crew for the first time and/or eavesdropping on us, then you might get confoozed. Not only do we base our everyday vernacular on silly inside jokes, we also tend to make up words. Yes, as previously mentioned, the term PLEGALZIA can be used to describe this odd variation of the english language.

Easy Breezy: The word of summer 2k8. Not only used to describe the way one dresses (hippie skirts, flowy fabrics, etc…), it is also a mind set.

Ex: “Hey guys, don’t fight–be easy breezy! Why can’t we all get along?”

Edgy: The opposite of easy breezy. Think of dark nails and middle fingers. Yeah that’s right, even the PLE girls can have some attitude every once in a while.

It’s gonna be okay: Lady Ga Ga is clearly ripping our steeze. (Not to mention our obsession with the words GAH GAH GAH). This phrase has been used for quite some time, in every situation imaginable. Something bad happened? Not feeling well? Vomiting your guts out in an abandonned school? Sssshhhhh, just remember: it’s gonna be okay.

Answerin’ it: Like most of the PLE girls, I’ve worked some jobs that I’m not too proud of. One of them being: Opinion Search. During my short employment there, I had to ask a series of questions. When asking a Southern woman for her race, she replied: NOT ANSWERIN’ IT! Ever since then, the term “answerin it” can describe something cool/uncool.

Ex 1 : “I’m soooo not answerin’ Julie’s new attitude- what a bitch!”

Ex 2 : “Mmmm look at that hot dude over there! I’m answerin’ it!”

Call back Sunday: Yet another Opinion Search joke. When filling out a section of when to call back a certain respondent, it was written “CALLBACK SUNDAY?” Whoever originally filled out the section was confoozed. Now, the term “CALL BACK SUNDAY” can used in similar contexts as “answerin’ it”

Ex 1: “I enjoy those shoes–call back Sunday.”

Ex 2: “What a fugly ass t-shirt…I will not call back on Sunday.”

Itch you can’t Scratch: Invented by Katherine Agnes Claire Wright-Bull, this term is straight forward. While it originally refers to the Monostat Yeast Infection commercial (EWWWW), it can now be used to describe anything that bothers you sooo much, yet you can’t change it.

Ex: “The lady on the bus was clipping her nails on the bus. Augh, it was such a big itch that I couldn’t scratch.”

Anyways, I’m sure that after reading this, most of you are judging. It’s going to be okay though. I’m gonna be easy breezy and answerin’ it on Sunday. In the mean time, you can be an edgy asshole while I remain that itch you can’t scratch.

- SARAH DUNAJ

Shivs

A shiv (from the Romani word chiv) is a slang term for a sharp or pointed implement used as an improvised knife-like weapon. The shiv is the favored weapon of inmates in prisons across the world. It is infamous for its versatility - a shiv can be anything from a glass shard with cloth wrapped around one end to form a handle, to a razorblade stuck in the end of a toothbrush, to a sharpened spoon. Some inmates have even sharpened the ends of pork chop bones to make them into weapons.

A related term is shank. While the words are often used interchangeably, shank can specifically refer to a weapon fashioned from the metal shank of a prison-issued boot or shoe. Since inmates were able to fashion effective shivs out of metal shanks, many prisons no longer issue footwear with metal shanks. Another related term is the Scottish slang word, chib. To chib is to stab or slash with a sharp weapon.

PLEGALZIA continued

Yes, it’s that time again. Time for a few more definitions. I’m sure most you readers don’t believe that we actually speak like this…but we do. Is that sad? Anyways, to avoid judgment from all you peepin’ Toms and eavesdroppers, hurr are some of our frequently used words…

Ablaquoi: This is a long story that involves an awkward saying and a woman named Abla. As previously mentioned, I’m socially awkz so I occasionally use random words to fill in silent moments. One of these fillers is “abla”. Well, funny enough, a woman started working with me. Her name? ABLA! So if I were ever to say that word, she would be like: QUOI? (as in, yes, that’s my name…what?). Shivs? Get it– ABLA! QUOI? ABLAQUOI!

Chili’s Baby Back Ribs: Even though 2/3 of the original PLE galz are vegan, we still use this expression. This phrase is used when one is cold or “chily”. Example: “It’s freezing outside. It’s so Chili’s Baby Back Ribs outside.”

Confoozed: This expression is used in the same manner as the word “confused” but it pronounced differently. Apparently, it strikes a nerve with a lot of people. I’ve even been pushed against a wall by an angry drunk man because of the way I said the word. Shivs? Advice: use it when everyone is happy and sober.

Qwhat?: Is a hybrid between what and quoi. It was inspired by Miss Lolzlonde, who in a drunken state, managed to create a fusion for all you bilinguals out there.

Adabada/Adabado/Adabadont: These words were pre-PLE and I’m fully ashamed of them. The original meaning behind these are lost forever, yet the do or don’t versions literally mean do or don’t. The Adabada was just another silence filler. Example: “Chinese slippers and men with smelly breath are such adabadonts.”

PLEGALZIA

MMkay guys,

I know that it hasn’t been that long since my last “Definition” post, but I must keep urrone up-to-date. Yes, there are still many phrases that need to be explained. I feel like we have now created so many new words, that it can count as some new form of dialect: “PLEGALZIA“. Yes, if I could describe our own language in one word, it would defz be PLEGALZIA.

Czechoslovakia: Not only is this an Eastern European country, it is also a term that can replace the word “check”. For example: “Can I CZECHOSLOVAKIA my Facebook?”

Kid Sistering: Melissa Young, aka Kid Sister, is a semi-known singer with attitude. However, in PLEGALZIA, we use the term “kid sistering” as “kidding”. One can say such things as, “I didn’t mean to offend you. I was just KID SISTERING!”

Shayne Emz: A young man from the deep 450, Shayne “Emz” Lalonde is a talented graf artist with a heart of gold. We use this term to describe a sad state of mind, which stems from the “emz” part of his tagging name (Emo = Emz). Instead of claiming to be emo or sad, say something like “I’m so Shayne Emz today.” (My emo playlist on my Ipod is even entitled SHAYNE EMZ…I’m not kid sistering. )

Horbbz like Forbes: This phrase can be used to describe any situation that is semi comical yet horrible at the same time. The word Horbbz refers to “horrible” and is compared to the American magazine, Forbes .

Proot: I don’t know about you, but I sincerely hate all people who overuse emoticons. Especially, this one . You’re not being suggestive, funny or cute. Anyways, the word “proot” is the noise that one makes when doing the face. When you stick out your tongue and blow (or whatever that action is < > ), it makes that sound.

GAHGAHGAHGAHGAHGAH

Anyways, those are all the expressions that I can think of for now. PLEGALZIA is expanding day by day and will continue to grow.

PROOT OUT SHIVSIEZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

-Ess Doo Nay.

Gah Gah Gah

AH HEY WHATS UP fellow blawgerz,

Ok, so listen, don’t judge me or anything, but I feel semi awkz writing this blog. Maybe it’s because I use wayyyyyy too many abbreviations. I tend to give meaningless words a whole new meaning. Lemme give you the 411. . .

• Awkz: Awkward or socially awkward

• Gah Gah Gah: My newest expression. This a cross between “hahaha” and “augh”.

• Augh: Used as a term of annoyance.

• Shivs: Possibly the most frequently used word in my vocabulary. “Shivs” can be used to describe most situations in my life. Synonyms include: sketchy, socially awkward, annoying, and weird.

• Tarif Reduit: This term refers a certain STM ID card one must own to purchase the student priced bus pass. I use this expression as “terrifying”. Get it? Tarif — Terrif? Augh, don’t judge me!

• Oxford Dictionary: This expressions Oxford is shortened to “Ox” which is pronounced like “awkz”, which means socially awkward. This is a term to describe situations in code, so outsiders will never know that I’M judging THEM.

• Oontz: Used to fill in semi-awkward silences.

• Randz: A shortened version of the word “random”.

• DB: Pronounced Dee Bee, this term is short for “Dumb bitch”.

Ok, so I think you get it now. I’m super shivs, a socially awkz db and am actually gah gah gah. But before you throw your gavel down and judge me, invent new words! IT’S FUN..Believe me.

- Sarah Shivsy Dunaj